Toilets and Food


The two don’t mix and never should…

There are many things you can do while sitting on a toilet. Read a book, the newspaper, check all your social media feeds, some people even talk on their phones and there are some bodily function too.

Eating is definitely not one of the things that should be done. It’s just not right.

But then something like this happens…

I had just got back from grocery shopping, had to go to the washroom really, really bad. Decided to put all the food away first, somethings belonged in the fridge, some in the freezer. The very last cold thing I put away was a box of Organic Fudge Bars. I had to try one. Besides, knowing my son, they would be gone by morning.

I opened one and started nibbling at it, from different angles, when I remembered I had to go to the washroom.

You can’t put a fudge bar down, especially an organic one. You can’t give it to someone else to hold, for obvious reasons and I had already thrown out the little bag it came in. So I brought it with me to the washroom, trying to eat it fast but it was too cold. Couldn’t hold it in my mouth, for the same reason.

Even though it went against all my beliefs, there was only one thing left to do… sit down and enjoy it.

I didn’t like it, kind of grossed me out but I finished it anyway. The only thing that comes remotely close to this is when you are having a few drinks with friends. Eventually, you end up in there with a bottle. The difference is, it can be sat down somewhere, seems more sanitary somehow.

My advice to everyone out there, maybe it’s a Life Hack, is to never, ever, start a fudge bar, or anything else frozen on a stick when you really, really have to go. You’ll be left with a moral dilemma.


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